Archive for September 6th, 2006
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
I love Ron Artest. Loved him at St. John’s. Loved him when he applied for a job at Circuit City. As he clawed his way up the ladder to NBA stardom. When he asked for a month off of basketball just to rest. As he took off into the stands. On the cover of SI with Larry Legend. And, now more than ever, I love him as he’s releasing a new album next month.
Seriously, it drops on Halloween, the day before the Kings first game, and he’ll allegedly be promoting it on Live With Regis and Kathie Lee Kelly, among other places. Here are other details you certainly can’t live without, courtesy of Sactown Royalty…
“The first single, Fever, is apparently being heard. (I can’t find it, though I don’t regularly attend mix shows or listen to much hip hop FM radio.) The B-side to Fever is, um, called Working the Pole. I wonder what that’s about.”
Of course, if you’re a longtime reader of Mr. Irrelevant and listener of Sports Bloggers Live (thank you), then you’ve heard Artest shot calling before. This what it sounded like when he stopped by SBL last November for what was one of our most memorable moments…
Hear Artest’s full SBL interview.
Hear Artest rap on SBL! (Right click on the link and ‘Save Target As’ to download.)
Ron Ron’s World [Sactown Royalty]
Look, Ron Artest Stripper News [True Hoop]
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
Filed under: Culture, Sports
I was a late bloomer when it came to knowing the rules of football. I learned the basics (four downs, touchdown is six points, etc.) from NFL Blitz when I was 15; a few years back I started to understand positions and audibles when I came to college and started watching our football team and going to the games.
For Slate author Felix Gillette, the intricacies of football were made clear via Madden 2007. In this interesting narrative, Gillette examines how more minor details in televised football have become understandable as a result of a few Madden sessions.
As Gillette concludes, “in the years to come, people who grew up learning about football via Xbox will expect broadcasters to give them more complex information.” Has video games provided a means by which one can learn complex rules in an entertaining environment? How might this process be applicable for, say, quantum mechanics?
Read | Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments
SPONSORED BY: Age of Empires III - Real-Time Strategy Game Control a European power on a quest to colonize and conquer the New World. AOE3 introduces new gameplay elements, as well as new civilizations, units, and technologies. http://www.ageofempires3.com/
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
Filed under: Culture, Sports
I was a late bloomer when it came to knowing the rules of football. I learned the basics (four downs, touchdown is six points, etc.) from NFL Blitz when I was 15; a few years back I started to understand positions and audibles when I came to college and started watching our football team and going to the games.
For Slate author Felix Gillette, the intricacies of football were made clear via Madden 2007. In this interesting narrative, Gillette examines how more minor details in televised football have become understandable as a result of a few Madden sessions.
As Gillette concludes, “in the years to come, people who grew up learning about football via Xbox will expect broadcasters to give them more complex information.” Has video games provided a means by which one can learn complex rules in an entertaining environment? How might this process be applicable for, say, quantum mechanics?
Read | Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments
SPONSORED BY: Age of Empires III - Real-Time Strategy Game Control a European power on a quest to colonize and conquer the New World. AOE3 introduces new gameplay elements, as well as new civilizations, units, and technologies. http://www.ageofempires3.com/
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
This is the AFC West. This is not like the AFC North. You might have noticed this earlier. This is where they play in different time zones than the one in which we live. Whew. All irrefutable facts.
• Robert Weintraub, Slate: Denver, San Diego, Oakland, Kansas City.
• Peter King, Sports Illustrated: Denver, San Diego, Kansas City, Oakland.
• Paul Zimmerman, Sports Illustrated: Denver, Kansas City, San Diego, Oakland.
• Aaron Schatz, FootballOutsiders and Fox Sports: Denver, San Diego, Kansas City, Oakland.
• AJ Daulerio, Deadspin Cultural Oddsmaker: Denver, San Diego, Kansas City, Oakland.
• Michael David Smith, Football Outsiders: Denver, San Diego, Kansas City, Oakland.
• Deadspin: San Diego, Kansas City, Denver, Oakland. We think this is the year where it finally falls apart for the Broncos. Which is what they cut for cutting Ron Dayne.
Maybe we’re just angry about Jake Plummer still. Your thoughts? Give ‘em in the comments, if you have the intenstinal fortitude generally considered necessary for such endeavors.
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
We are officially one day before the start of the NFL season, so it’s probably time to start previewing the monster. The key to the NFL’s success — other than fantasy football and gambling, of course — is the rabid nature of its fans. That is to say: You don’t see a lot of people painting their faces for their favorite golfer.
We asked a gaggle of writers, from the Web, from print, from books, even a TV guy or two, to tell us, in as many or as little words as they need, why My Team Is Better Than Your Team. This is not meant to be factual, or dispassionate, or even logical: We just asked them to riff on why they love their team so much, or what their team means to them, or whatever. We will be running two a day until the beginning of the NFL season.
Right now: the Jacksonville Jaguars. Your author is Dan Shanoff.
Dan Shanoff was the creator (and writer) of the Daily Quickie on ESPN.com. He now blogs daily at danshanoff.blogspot.com. He also hosts the monthly Varsity Letters Reading Series in New York City (tonight!). His words are after the jump.
———————————————————–
I’m guessing that I will set an unbreakable record among Deadspin readers (and certainly Deadspin NFL preview writers) for “history of support.”
Two weeks.
I didn’t even know I liked the Jags until Will asked me if I’d like to do a preview, because the Jags were an unclaimed team.
And so here I am: Hooray, Jags.
The truth is: I have been living without a favorite NFL team since I left my hometown D.C. for college in Chicago, where I realized that being a displaced Bears fan sucked when you finally lived locally among them. I assume this works similarly for all teams.
So I plan to follow “my Jags” as avidly as you follow your team after decades of support. That’s the dirty little secret of fandom: The difference between SuperFan and SortaFan is nominal; the bar to hurdle is whether you care about a team AT ALL. (Die-hard fans can rant now.)
I’m not saying you’ll see me in a pink Leftwich alternate jersey with the rest of the “Jag Hags.” (Amazingly, as yet unclaimed as a fan-base nickname.)
But I will tell you a couple of reasons the Jaguars have been fun to follow. For, um, two weeks:
(1) Instant pet peeve: Fuck-tards who call them the “Jag-wires” or the British-borrowed “Jag-you-ares.” I can’t believe that professional sports commentators (or football fans, for that matter) can mispronounce the name of a simple zoo animal. It’s “Jag-whar.” Say it: Jag-whar.
(2) Byron Leftwich obliterates the classic racial stereotype about black quarterbacks, which makes him arguably the most fascinating QB in the league. He is the anti-Vick. No QB in the NFL is LESS athletic; Leftwich makes Drew Bledsoe look nimble. He is a model for every mattress-topped “Byron Nebbish” who ever wanted to be a quarterback but stopped when distracted by a couch-side bag of Cheez Doodles.
What makes this idea even more interesting is that his top target, Matt Jones, obliterates every racial stereotype about white WRs: “Possession” receiver? Not at 6-6 and running a 4.3 40. The combination of the two make them the pass-catch poster boys for eroding the subtle (and not-so-subtle) racism that dominates NFL talent evaluation.
(3) Alltel Stadium was built with a capacity of about a zillion, to accommodate the “Cletus The Slack-Jawed” masses* who descend on the city for the annual Cracker-Redneck Florida-Georgia college football grudge match.
Apparently, they didn’t consider that there’s no way in hell they could fill all those seats for a pro team in north Florida (not even with bulk tickets sold for Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dylan, Dermot, Jordan, Taylor, Brittany, Wesley, Rumor, Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, Chloe, Max, Hunter, Rubella, Scabies, Kendall, Caitlin, Noah, Sasha, Morgan, Kyra, Ian, Lauren et al), so the Jaguars regularly were victims of the NFL’s local-TV blackout policy.
To remedy the situation, they put a tarp over enough of those seats (used exclusively for the Gators-Bulldogs game) that now the team will finally sell out its games and get the games shown on local TV. The virtuous cycle of this can’t be stressed enough.
(* - I’m allowed to describe them like that because I married into an extended family from north-central Florida. It’s like Tim Whatley converting to Judaism for the jokes.)
(4) The Jags defense will eat your children. If this same D was anywhere but Jacksonville, it would be considered the best in the league. If the Steelers were smart, they would hold Ben Roethlisberger out for Week 2, because the Jags D could give him a “season-endectomy.”
(The offense is, ah, a little less dominant. RB Fred Taylor most notably ranks among the all-time most maddening of fantasy football talents; he is at the top of the classic argument, “If he could stay healthy, what if…?“)
I wasn’t a fan last year, so I can’t speak to the 28-3 playoff beating they took from the Pats, but if they can earn an AFC Wild Card spot, there’s no reason that the D can’t carry them through a surprise run deep into the playoffs.
(5) Rookie names: The 2006 first-round pick is named Marcedes Lewis, and I have not been able to figure out whether that’s supposed to be an intentional variant homage to the luxury brand “Mercedes” or simply a misspelling at the hospital when he was born. If you Google “Marcedes” and the first entry is “Did you mean ‘mercedes,’”, that might be an indication that you consider a delivery-room spell-check. Either way, I am rethinking my own newborn’s name as “Chevette Shavette Shanoff.”
(Meanwhile, Backup RB Maurice Jones-Drew added “Jones” to his name during last year’s college season to honor his late grandfather. He’s also only 5-foot-6 and, consequently, one punt return for a TD away from being one of the league’s top fan favorite. He also has the initials “MJD,” which should make him a Deadspin weekend obsession.)
To be honest, I’m less intrigued by the Jags than I am at the prospect of adopting a favorite NFL team at all — a rooting interest on Sundays beyond hoping for crazy team-agnostic storylines that make for good column-fodder. (Obviously, that’s no longer an issue.)
So here’s my “Jag-Off” theory I’m going to be testing: That the difference between lifelong die-hard fandom and instantaneous, temporary allegiance is cosmetic.
Now, what do Jags fans do to sign off? “Rowr?” Cripes. Gotta do something about that. Any ideas, Jag Hags?
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
Most days, we get a number of emails from you readers.
We truly love every one of them, even though 85% are some variation on “you were really funny for like the first 3 weeks I read, and then it just kinda got old.”
(The one dude who sends that every week with new wording is the best - he’s creative.)
Anyway, every now and then, we get one we can actually use to generate content - those are quite the bonus, especially in the hell of the offseason, on a day when Life Cereal calls in sick due to “heat exhaustion”.
As many of you know, Stephon Marbury is on a press tour for his new $15 shoe. The following speaks for itself.
[redacted],
In terms of Stephon’s food request for the trip, there were no Funyuns available (none until Friday, probably). The following items have arrived and are in the warehouse in Recruitment’s section (ask Regina of the whereabouts if I’m not around):
4 - regular sized bags of Cooler Ranch Doritos
4 - regular sized bags of Nacho Cheesier Doritos
4 - regular sized bags of Spicier Nacho Doritos
9 - regular sized bags of Mesquite BBQ Kettle Cooked Lays
12 - packages of Pepperidge Farm Choco Chip Cookies (Sausolito or Tahoe Chunky)
72 - bottles of 24oz Poland Springs Water (six packages of 12 in each package)
3 (or 4..) - large 1-lb bags of Skittles
4 - large bags of individually wrapped Twizzlers (each bag has a bunch of snack-sized individually wrapped Twizzlers)
The location, again, is in the Warehouse. Come find me and I’ll lead you to them. If you need more items, we need to place the order by 9pm tonight in order to have it shipped from 9-11am tomorrow morning.
Also, please be sure to let me know whether or not the luggage bags got there so that I can call the vendor up if something went wrong.
Where to begin…where to begin…?
The Funyons? The fact they couldn’t find the Funyons? Damn it, Regina! Where are you when the $15 shoe guy needs his Funyons!?
Moving on, we see that Steph apparently likes to go through a progression in terms of Doritos intensity. He starts slow and mild, and moves his way up to the Spicier Nacho flavor. (No doubt cursing the lack of Funyons the whole way.)
Then we get to the ever-lovable Pepperidge Farm Choco Chip Cookies (Sausolito or Tahoe Chunky), which surely means Stevie Franchise is stopping by for an appearance, yes?
Skittles, Twizzlers, blah, blah, blah - where the Yoohoo and “vat of hot fudge”? What’s funny is this arrived the same day as this big article on the Knicks’ strength and conditioning program.
(Apologies, by the way, for never creating a Stephon Marbury category before now. We missed it for whatever reason. We’ll go back and rearchive one of these days, because there’s plenty of Steph in said archives.)
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
This might be our favorite division in football. Big Ben’s bashed up face/appendix combo, Joey Porter, the Bengals cavalcade of feloniousness, Ray Lewis and sex tapes and murder raps … oh, and the Browns too. What do the kids think?
• Robert Weintraub, Slate: Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Baltimore, Cleveland.
• Peter King, Sports Illustrated: Cincinnati, Pittsburgh, Baltimore, Cleveland.
• Paul Zimmerman, Sports Illustrated: Pittsburgh, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Cleveland.
• Aaron Schatz, FootballOutsiders and Fox Sports: Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Baltimore, Cleveland.
• AJ Daulerio, Deadspin Cultural Oddsmaker: Pittsburgh, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Cleveland.
• Michael David Smith, Football Outsiders: Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Baltimore, Cleveland.
• Deadspin: Cincinnati, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, Baltimore. We’re going to stay out of the whole “should you be a Browns or Ravens fan?” discussion today. We’ve caused enough problems.
If you can sneak away from your Chris Henry/four teenage girls sandwich, we encourage you to drop your predictions in the comments.
Continue Reading September 6th, 2006
Mixed Martial Arts— UFC 61 Surpasses $30 Million in Pay-Per-View Sales, Plus Final PPV Buyrate for UFC 60
by Ivan TrembowOriginally Published on MMAWeekly
Last week, MMAWeekly took a look at the fighter salaries for UFC 62, which took place on …
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