Archive for July 21st, 2006

GCM Vets Look To Rebound At 9/9 DOG VII

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006


Greatest Common Multiple have announced that Japan’s premiere cage event will strike back on September 9th.

GCM’s Demolition of Octagon Gear series will make its Stepember 9th return to its usual home base, Tokyo’s Differ Ariake, for what will be the brand’s seventh installment. The event will also be a caged homecoming for three GCM stars of the Wajyutsu Keisyukai Network. Returning to the octagon to compete will be Hidetaka Monma, Eiji Mitsuoka, and Taiyo Nakahara.

The 32 year old Monma, a 2002 Pancrase Neo-Blood Tournament Champion, boasts a 3-o record in the DOG cage. Monma stepped into the HERO’S ring in May, in a quarterfinal qualifier for the 2006 HERO’S 70 kilogram tournament. While he had competed for most of his career at weights around 82 and 83 kilograms, Monma cut an extraordinary amount of weight to make the 70 kilogram limit. Perhaps drained from his weight cutting debacle, Monma was sluggish in the ring against opponent Gesias “JZ” Calvancanti, who took Monma to the mat and unleashed a potent assault of punches, stopping him in just over two minutes.

Eiji Mitsuoka last competed in February at GCM’s MARS, where he took on former Shooto World Welterweight Champion Vitor “Shaolin” Ribeiro. Mitsuoka, while game throughout, was thoroughly dominated by the jiu-jitsu wizard, who put a grappling clinic on Mitsuoka on the canvas. Mitsuoka was able to last until the final bell, but was unable showcase any of his ability beyond survival.

Taiyo Nakahara, like Monma, stepped into the HERO’S ring on May 5th looking to earn his way into the quarterfinals of the 70 kilogram tournament, but was turned away by Canadian Ivan Menjivar. Nakahara struggled throughout the ten minute bout with Menjivar, and was thoroughly outstruck and outpointed from bell to bell.

Now, all three men will look to rebound from their recent disappointments when they step back into the friendly confines of DOG’s octagon in six weeks time.

Greatest Common Multiple Presents Demolition Of Octagon Gear VII
September 9th, 2006
Differ Ariake
Tokyo, Japan
Doors Open: 16:00
Fights Start: 17:00

Scheduled To Participate:
Hidetaka Monma (Wajyutsu Keisyukai A3)
Eiji Mitsuoka (Wajyutsu Keisyukai RJW)
Taiyo Nakahara (Wajyutsu Keisyukai GODS)

Hokazono Becomes Fourth Featherweight King, Youngsters Shine At 7/21 Shooto

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006


Akitoshi Hokazono was an amateur Shooto champion. Akitoshi Hokazono was a rookie Shooto champion. Now, Akitoshi Hokazono is a world Shooto champion.

Hokazono has kept a low profile during his Shooto ascent. Having competed only seven times in the Shooto ring over his four year career, Hokazono was able to maintain a peculiar amount of anonymity as he climbed the Shooto ranks. July 21st marked only the third time that Hokazono competed at Japan’s fight mecca, Korakuen Hall. However, the 29 year old Osaka native made is a night to remember, as he became the fourth man to wind clasp the straps of the Shooto World Featherweight Championship around his waist.

Early, it was Kenji Osawa who put the pressure on Hokazono, but powerful counterstriking paved the way for Hokazono’s title victory. After trading shots through the first frame, Hokazono asserted himself late in the round with a hard left hook to the face of Osawa, that put him on the mat. Early in round two, Hokazono struck with a left-right hook combination that stumbled the Wajyutsu star. Parrying the aggressive punching of Osawa, Hokazono was able to dish out damage until the final bell, swelling Osawa’s right eye, and gashing him under his left.

In round three, Hokazono went for the finish as he took Osawa’s back, but Osawa was able to stand up, carrying Hokazono for a piggyback, defending ably. Though he was unable to close out the fight against Osawa the way he did two years ago, when he choked him out in only 65 seconds, Hokazono left no doubt in anyone’s mind who the champion was, as he took a unanimous decision victory to become the fourth World Featerweight Champion of Professional Shooto.

Another Shooto champion, “Lion” Takeshi Inoue, saw action in the semifinal bout of the evening. In what was seemingly intended to be a showcase fight for the young champion, the bout wound up as more of a showcase fight for his opponent, American Top Team youngster Cole Miller. Miller came out aggressively from the start of round one, flexing his stand up skills, and putting the champion on his heels, forcing the champion to take him to the mat. On the floor, Miller was able to use his tremendous length to frustrate the typically powerful ground punching of Inoue, stealing the first round from the champion.

The second and third round saw Inoue take Miller to the ground early, attempting to pound from top position, but he was continuously frustrated by the long-legged Miller, who was able to work his hips up on Inoue, forcing him to defend rather than attack as zealously as usual. While the third frame saw Inoue find greater success with economic, single power punches from the guard, Miller was game throughout, even attacking Inoue from his back with punches. When it went to the judges’ cards, it was clear that Inoue had done enough to win by imposing his gameplan over the final two rounds, but Miller had surely spoiled what was supposed to be an exhibition of Inoue’s talent, by validating his skill level against Shooto’s 65 kilogram ace.

In what proved to be the most hotly competitive bout of the evening, former World Featherweight Champion Ryota Matsune made his return to the Shooto ring after twenty months on the shelf due to a knee injury, taking on 2005 Featherweight Rookie Champion, Takeya Mizugaki. Both men were able to alternate early rounds, as the rookie ace shook off an early flying armbar attempt from Matsune, and pounded from top position. Back on the feet, Mizugaki was able to score with hard punches to earn himself the round. In the second round, Matsune was able to use his outstanding wrestling and grappling to pass guard, and control the top position. With under a minute left, Matsune was able to block an attempted throw from Mizugaki, and take his back, working to sink a choke with just under a minute left.

In the third round, both men traded on the feet, before Matsune got a takedown on Mizugaki, and sought to repeat the last round as he moved to half guard, and side control. However, after regaining full guard, Mizugaki was able to kick Matsune off of him, and scramble to his feet, where he scored with punches, and a late takedown. Both men fought with desperation until the final bell, with a palpable sense of tension hanging in Korakuen Hall.

While one judge gave the bout to Mizugaki with a 30-29 scorecard, the other two scored the bout 29-29, resulting in a majority draw. Again, it was the largely untested underdog showcasing his true ability against the heavy favorite. While neither Miller, nor Mizugaki were able to notch a victory, the strength of their performances showed that they’re no longer up-and-comers: they have arrived.

Crymson and Sustain Present Professional Shooto
July 21st, 2006
Korakuen Hall
Tokyo, Japan

Official Results:

2006 Shooto Welterweight Rookie Tournament Semifinal
Class B, 70 KG, 2R 5M
Yoshihiro Koyama (Paraestra Matsudo) defeated Yoshiki Noguchi (Paraestra Sapporo) by unanimous decision (20-17, 20-17, 20-18) at full time limit.

2006 Shooto Bantamweight Rookie Tournament Quarterfinal
Class B, 56 KG, 2R 5M
Takuya Mori (Paraestra Sapporo) defeated Takayuki Kobe (ALIVE) by majority decision (20-19, 20-19, 19-19) at full time limit.

2006 Shooto Featherweight Rookie Tournament Quarterfinal
Class B, 60 KG, 2R 5M
Teruyuki Matsumoto (Shooting Gym Osaka) defeated Kazuya Tamura (Mach Dojo) by submission via rear naked choke at 1:55 of the first round.

2006 Shooto Lightweight Rookie Tournament Semifinal
Class B, 65 KG, 2R 5M
Daisuke Ishizawa (Paraestra Sapporo) defeated Hiroshi Nakamura (Tokyo Yellow Mans) by KO via right hook at 4:26 of the second round.

Class A, 70 KG, 3R 5M
Yusuke Endo (Gokita Gym) defeated Clayton Guida (Hellhouse) by submission via armbar at 2:47 of the first round.

Class A, 60 KG, 3R 5M
So Tazawa (GUTSMAN Shooto Dojo) defeated Hiroyuki Tanaka (Chokushinkai) by unanimous decision (30-27, 30-27, 30-28) at full time limit.

Class A, 56 KG, 3R 5M
Masatoshi Abe (Abe Ani Combat Club) defeated Junji Ikoma (Chokushinkai) by TKO via doctor’s stoppage due to a swollen eye at 2:06 of the first round.

Class A, 60 KG, 3R 5M
Takeya Mizugaki (Shooting Gym Hakkei) and Ryota Matsune (Paraestra Matsudo) fought to a majority draw (30-29, 29-29, 29-29) at full time limit.

Class A, 66 KG, 3R 5M
Takeshi Inoue (Shooting Gym Yokohama) defeated Cole Miller (American Top Team) by unanimous decision (30-28, 29-28, 29-28) at full time limit.

For The Vacant Shooto World Featherweight Championship
Class A, 60 KG, 3R 5M
Akitoshi Hokazono (Freelance) defeated Kenji Osawa (Wajyutsu Keisyukai A3) by unanimous decision (30-27, 30-28, 30-28) at full time limit.

Mihara Takes Tourney, Damms Win At 7/21 MARS ATTACK

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006


The Trinity Corporation Presents MARS: MARS ATTACK 01
July 21st, 2006
Shinjuku FACE
Shinjuku, Japan

Official Results:

MARS ATTACKers Amateur Audition
65 KG, 2R 3M
Toshihiko Tomita (RB Academy) defeated Hiroshi Kosakai (Freelance) by decision via points (5-4).

70.5 KG, 3R 5M
Rodrigo Damm (Alliance Jiu-Jitsu) defeated Fan Ju Don (Blue Dragon) by submission via rear naked choke at 3:56 of the first round.

MARS Japanese Middleweight Tournament Semifinal
83 KG, 2R/1EXT 5M
Hidemi Mihara (Cobra Kai MMA Dojo) defeated Naoki Yoshioka (Freelance) by submission via armbar at 1:36 of the first round.

MARS Japanese Middleweight Tournament Semifinal
83 KG, 2R/1EXT 5M
Kozo Urita (Seiken Kaikan) defeated Takeshi Ogawa (Kujuken) by TKO via corner stoppage at 1:43 of the first round.

77 KG, 3R 5M
Daisuke Hanazawa (Cobra Kai MMA Dojo) defeated TOSHI (Kujuken) by submission via rear naked choke at 3:38 of the second round.

55 KG, 2R/1EXT 5M
Carina Damm (Alliance Jiu-Jitsu) defeated Miku Matsumoto (Club Barbarian) by submission via armbar at 1:17 of the second round.

MARS Japanese Middleweight Tournament Final
83 KG, 2R/1EXT 5M
Hidemi Mihara (Cobra Kai MMA Dojo) defeated Kozo Urita (Seiken Kaikan) by decision via points (13-0).

Ben Roethlisberger, Pure Country

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006

povertyneck.jpgPittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, fresh off his apparent facial reconstruction that has somehow made him much more normal looking (and vaguely lobotomized) than he did before his motorcycle accident, is going to appear in a country music video. That in itself is no big deal. It’s a video we’re fairly certain we’ll never see anyway.

But we had to point out the name of the band. The band is called “The PovertyNeck Hillbillies.” We’re sorry: That’s the worst goddamned band name we have ever heard. Apparently they’re big around Pittsburgh but haven’t quite broken through nationally, something they’re hoping Roethlisberger’s apperance in the video will change.

We love Pittsburgh: Almost everyone we have met from there is pretty much our type of people. (Commence mocking of our upbringing … now.) But the Rooney family has “named the PovertyNeck Hillibillies as the official band of the team.” No wonder Randle El left.

Big Ben To Appear In Country Music Video [Pittsburgh Live]

A-Log laughs in the face of danger

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006

Alex Rodriguez.jpg
This man can kill you with
his stare
Everyone’s favorite $25 million dollar piñata is the subject of trade rumors. Whaaaaaat? That’s right. Yankees’ third baseman Alex Rodriguez has been rumored to be in a crazy gay porn sex tape trade with the Phillies. The reported deal would send A-Log and OF Melky Cabrera for Phillies Bobby Abreu, Pat Burrell, Tom Gordon and David Bell.

However, A-Log, being the brave soul that he is, laughed in the face of such inanity.

“I would veto it,” he said, his evil laugh reverberating even through every small crevice in the clubhouse.

If Rodriguez exercised his executive right to veto any trade, then both the Senate and the House of Representatives would need a 2/3 majority vote to override his veto. But that’s what this country was built on—a system of checks and balances. That and a lot of hookers.

A Game Grows In Brooklyn

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006

cyclonestadium.jpgOne of our favorite places to watch a baseball game is KeySpan Park in Coney Island, Brooklyn, home of the Brooklyn Cyclones. It’s small, intimate and yet still has the carnival atmosphere we love minor league baseball games to have. Well, yesterday, they had the ultimate baseball experience: They played a 26-inning game, with the Cyclones eventually losing to Oneonta 6-1. Several amazing aspects to this game:

• It was “Kids Camp Day,” so it was a noon start. Needless to say, most of the kids didn’t make it all the way through. First-pitch attendance was 9,004, but the Cyclones’ site estimates only about 200 people were left by the end.
• The score was 1-1 for most of the 26 innings, which is why the game was a relatively brisk six hours, 40 minutes, all matters considered.
• Here’s our favorite: Cyclones manager George Greer was ejected in the bottom of the first inning after arguing a force out. Which meant he was had to watch all 25 innings from the clubhouse. Great timing.

Longest Game In League History [BrooklynCyclones.com]

Chalk One Up For The Little Guy

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006

damonbib22.jpgAnd so the debate rages: Does Johnny Damon, or doesn’t he, suck? We refuse to take sides, but one thing we can report is that our nation’s babies are now involved. A New Bedford housewife, still miffed over Damon’s defection to the Yankees, had been trying to sell “Johnny Damon Sucks” baby bibs on eBay. That was until Damon’s agent, Scott Boras, got wind of it and filed a couple of stacks of legal documents to have the item removed. But the mom, Ann Sylvia, fought back, and in negotiations with Damon’s lawyers, worked out a deal to get the bibs back online. She just can’t use Damon’s full name, or the Yankees’ logo. So Sylvia is now claiming victory. Read the e-mail exchange between Boras and Sylvia here, and laugh along with us as you get to the part where Boras claims that the bibs are an encroachment on Damon’s “intellectual property.” Finally, Sylvia could not let the matter rest without a final shot at Damon’s current state of Yankeeness:

What Damon did is just the ultimate betrayal in baseball. I don’t see how it could not be considered that.

And Damon’s response to all of this? It was something along the lines of: “What? A baby? Hey, it’s not mine! I was nowhere near New Bedford!”

Damon Sucks Bibs [eBay]
Wahhhh! Damon Sues Over Baby Clothes [MSNBC]

The Kings are in Sacramento

Continue Reading July 21st, 2006

While the new Sonics owners get defensive over their move to the OKC attempts to keep the Sonics in Seattle, another Western Conference city is sleeping a lot easier this morning.

Sacramento has reached an agreement with the Maloof Brothers (i.e. the Kings owners) to build a new downtown arena for 2010.

The thing will cost plus/minus $500M, and it sounds like it’s a pretty fair deal for all sides.

Under terms unveiled Thursday, the Maloofs would sign a 30-year lease for the Kings and Monarchs to play in the new arena, which would anchor a new sports and entertainment district in the downtown railyard.

The Maloofs would pay off their existing city loan of nearly $71 million in a lump sum. In addition, they would pay $4 million annually in rent for 30 years. The family would make a $20 million payment upfront for a capital repair reserve fund.

Their total contribution — not including the loan payoff — would be $142 million over 30 years. That’s between 26 percent and 30 percent of the facility’s cost, negotiators said.

The whole deal still has to go to the voters, but judging by Sactown Royalty’s mood, that shouldn’t be a problem. And yes, we judge everything in life by how Sactown Royalty feels.

We do have to admit - we’ll be sad to see Arco Arena get torn down. We’ve never been there and know nothing about it beyond the fact it’s named after a gas station, but everyone says it’s like the greatest place on Earth named Arco Arena.

Next up for the Kings is free agent Bonzi Wells (who’s doing yoga), and if they’re smart, they’ll take this to the people, who are probably all up on the Kings right now. How that would work, we have no idea - our job has never been contract negotiations nor contract analysis.

Our job is to Photoshop old ladies saying “whore”. Nothing more, nothing less. Creative bankruptcy has arrived, people. Enjoy it!

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