Posts filed under 'Baseball'
Continue Reading August 21st, 2008
The lawsuit was filed against the Chicago Archdiocese yesterday. The alleged molester, priest Daniel McCormick, has already been the subject of a lawsuit settled on behalf of the archdiocese last week. In that case 11 priests were sued by 16 children. The alleged molestation occured in August of 2005 which was, of course, the year the Chicago White Sox finally won a World Series.
The lawsuit claims McCormack molested the unnamed boy at Our Lady of the Westside School in September 2004 and again at a White Sox game in August 2005. Archdiocese spokeswoman Colleen Dolan said the lawsuit is “not a new case” of abuse. She said the lawsuit is the “finalization of a legal process on this particular case.”
Remember back when you were a kid and it was cool to see nuns at baseball games? Well, that’s still cool. Priests at White Sox games…not so much.
Family of alleged McCormack victim sues archdiocese [Chicago Sun-Times]
Priests and White Sox games may not mix well [Land of Dave Corzine]
Continue Reading August 20th, 2008
In an odd move even for them, the Cincinnati Reds front office has written an open letter to fans to apologize for being in last place. Of course, CEO Bob Castellini and GM Walt Jocketty don’t admit to any wrongdoing — there were injuries! And the weather has been generally bad! — but they don’t want too many fans jumping ship following the unloading of Adam Dunn and Ken Griffey Jr. amidst a 55-71 NL Central malaise.
We had high expectations for the 2008 season. Unfortunately the team has not played up to our expectations and we have sustained injuries to key players within our starting lineup and rotation. We opted to trade Ken Griffey Jr. and Adam Dunn at this time because we believe it provided the best outcome for the long-term success of the organization. By executing these inevitable changes now, we secured more players as part of our focus towards building a deeper, stronger inventory of young talent.
As we near September, we will continue to provide valuable playing time to our young players and new acquisitions who we feel can become significant contributors at the Major League level. We ask your continued trust and patience as we build the roster that will get us back on top. We appreciate your support and look forward to seeing you at the ballpark.
Full letter here. The Cubs beat the Reds on Tuesday 5-0.
Elsewhere in painful regret:
• “Sorry for any future coke binges with Lindsay Lohan. It really can’t be helped.” — Michael Phelps
• “Sorry, but we’ll be there too.” — Mary Kate, Ashley Olsen
• “Sorry for all the drunken Beijing shenanigans. Hey, I’m British.” — Bradley Wiggins
• “Sorry for the panties.” — Disney
• “Sorry for using all the LEGOs to build a mini-LEGO Olympics.” — LEGO User Group
• “Sorry; you’d think with all the fuss, I’d be a lot better.” — Alicia Sacramone
• “Sorry in advance for all the illegal shit that’s about to occur. Should be any day now.” — Chris Henry
A Letter To Reds Fans [Cincinnati Reds]
Continue Reading August 19th, 2008
And you thought Ozzie Guillen was all the White Sox had to fear in the locker room. Backup catcher Toby Hall is recovering after Jermaine Dye blocked his attempted pie to the face. Does anyone ever wonder where all these pies come from in baseball locker rooms? How many times have you had extra pies sitting around at your work? Yet, in baseball stadiums they’re everywhere. And it never gets old to hit someone in the face with one. We go to the Chicago Tribune blog for the details.
Backup catcher Toby Hall said his right shoulder was fine after teammate Jermaine Dye blocked his attempt at placing a shaving cream pie in his face during a post-game interview following the Sox’s 13-5 win over Seattle.
Hall had his right shoulder wrapped in ice but assured reporters he didn’t not re-injure his shoulder, which he separated in spring training of 2007.
Next thing you know group sex with the blow-up doll is going to be off limits too.
Close Shaves [Hardball: Chicago Sports Blog]
Shaving Cream Pies are Dangerous [Luol’s Dong]
Continue Reading August 18th, 2008
Your Olympic highlights from only moments ago or yesterday, depending on your time zone …
Chinese police guard the land events like dobermans on Red Bull, but evidently they consider 10 feet from shore international waters. No sooner had Marit Van Eupen and Kirsten Van Der Kolk of the Netherlands won gold in lightweight women’s double sculls, than two fans stripped to their underwear and swam out to congratulate them. No one tried to stop them, and what’s more, they swam back, got dressed, and rejoined the crowd. A shocking breach of security, considering that these guys could have been packing anything, from a Free Tibet sign to a torpedo. For his trouble, one of the fans got this lovely parting gift. Ha. Classic.
• Run, Jump, Run, Jump, Run, Jump. The U.S. pulled off the first medal sweep in men’s 400-meter hurdles since 1960, as Angelo Taylor won the gold in 47.25 seconds, followed by Kerron Clement and Bershawn Jackson.
• Ejections In Olympic Baseball? Jim Lefebvre — he’s been coaching the Chinese team for five years, as you know — was tossed along with two players during the United States’ 9-1 win on Monday. Ah, Lefebvre, could it be only two weeks ago that you were saying this? Jake Arrieta struck out seven in six innings Monday night and Taylor Teagarden and Nate Schierholtz each hit two-run doubles for the U.S. China’s top player, catcher Wang Wei, was knocked out of the game with a left knee injury following a collision at the plate with Matt LaPorta in the fifth. This began a beanball war, which resulted in China calling in all of our loans.
• Liu Xiang, Adieu. Much rending of garments and gnashing of teeth as Liu Xiang — the Michael Phelps of China, or so I’m told — was forced to withdraw from the 110 hurdles due to an Achilles injury.
• But There Is Something You Do Not Know. I Am Not Left-Handed. After two upsets, the U.S. men’s saber team ran out of luck. But it was still good enough for a silver medal. First it upset second-seeded Hungary in the quarterfinals, 45-44, and then eliminated third-seeded Russia on the final touch, 45-44, to make the gold-medal match. But top-seeded France was too much, winning 45-37. The U.S. was seeded seventh.
• It’s Individual Apparatus Time. Alicia Sacramone came close but failed to medal in the women’s vault, this time successfully avoiding an interview with Andrea Joyce, so that’s something. Shawn Johnson of the U.S., the all-around runner-up, was second again in the floor exercise, to Sandra Izbasa of Romania. America’s Nastia Liukin took the bronze.
• Olympic Tennis! … Hello? Is This Thing On? Rafael Nadal of Spain beat Fernando Gonzalez of Chile, 6-3, 7-6, 6-3, in the men’s singles final (sorry, no Roger Federer). In women’s singles, Elena Dementieva of Russia beat teammate Dinara Safina, 3-6, 7-5, 6-3 (Sorry, no Williams sisters). Serena and Venus did win doubles gold, however, by beating Anabel Medina Garrigues and Virginia Ruano Pascual of Spain, 6-2, 6-0.
Continue Reading August 18th, 2008
Does this pitcher look 13 to you? Mexico, once again I call shenanigans concerning your birth certificates. Anyway, Jesus Sauceda recorded the first perfect game in the Little League World Series in 29 years, although doing it in the least impressive way possible; in only four innings, and against Italy. The boot-shaped nation had to scour the entire country to find 12 kids who have even heard of baseball, and even then several of them still tried to kick ground balls to first.
Sauceda struck out all 12 batters he faced in a 12-0 win over Emilia, Italy on Sunday; the game ending after four innings due to the 10-run mercy rule. If you were in a moderately-long line for a polish dog, you missed it.
Sauceda starred at the plate, too, going 3-for-3 with six RBI, including a grand slam in the third inning. “The speed of that pitcher doesn’t exist in Italy,” Italian manager Andrea Bettati said, shaking his head.
Of course Bettati’s voice was dubbed, and it was hard to hear what he said over the Ennio Morricone soundtrack.
How are U.S. teams doing? Lake Charles, La., pitcher Trey Quinn threw a no-hitter in a 9-0 win over Jeffersonville, Ind.; and Waipahu, Hawaii, beat Tampa, Fla., 10-2. Tokyo beat White Rock, British Columbia, 9-3; and Maracaibo, Venezuela, stopped Dhahran, Saudi Arabia, 12-0. Jeffersonville, of course, was the team that had a no-hitter on Friday but still lost.
And now a quick glance at the calendar reveals that the teams who make the finals in Williamsport will have about three days of summer vacation remaining before school starts. Thanks, Little League, Inc.!
LLWS Sees First Perfect Game In 29 Years [NBCSports]
Continue Reading August 17th, 2008
Will Cole Hamels keep the Phillies in the NL East race? Will Cha Seung Baek prevent San Diego from being the worst team in baseball? Will you even be able to see this live blog? These queries and few others will be answered once you jump to the rhythm. (Jump jump to the rhythm.)
* * *
9:23 — Gaaaaah. Fuckin’ “slide piece.” I don’t know what the hell that is. MARK IT DOWN WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT. Joe Morgan says that’s the official term. It’s actually not. He now has Jon Miller speaking it. Or Jon Miller is speaking in tongues. I don’t know which, but you will have blood plasma to pay for this, Morgan.
9:23 — A quick promo on tomorrow’s Little League games. One of them is “Guam vs. Mexico.” Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t Guam not a foreign country or territory?
9:21 — Cole Hamels gets out with little pain, proving he would probably make a poor AL pitcher.
9:19 — There’s Only One October™. The other thing you thought was October is actually March.
Bottom 4th
1 
0
9:18 — Now Edgar Gonzalez bats. Oh, my God, could he drive in his brother? (Answer: newp.)
9:16 — Adrian Gonzalez gets hit on his body. That’s one free base.
9:15 — Kevin Kouzmanoff hits a deep fly to left-center, where the fence extends ever far. Just another warning track out.
9:13 — While ESPN sits down with Hamels on how he developed his changeup, let’s get down to the real scouting report:
Name: Cole Hamels
Born: December 27, 1983
Throws: Left
Bats: Left
What Two Wrongs Make: Right
WHIP: 1.07
HANDCUFFS: N/A (wife not into that)
Gets Batters Out When: Curveball dips down below knees
Doesn’t Get Batters Out When: Curveball dips down below left field scoreboard
Top 4th
1 0
9:11 — They’re going to keep saying that Edgar Gonzalez and Alex Gonzalez are brothers, every time they throw from second to first, aren’t they? Although maybe it’s good they do that, because otherwise people are just going to assume that the baseball world is frought with Gonzalezeses.
9:09 — Melky Cabrera and Richie Sexson were demoted and released, respectively, for the Yankees. That’s teetering ever close to the “are they done or not” square. One more outburst like that, and it’s so covered with a red dot.
9:08 — I looked it up. The active leader is Matt Stairs. I retract the previous statement.
9:05 — Pat Burrell has the second most career home runs of any active player not to make the All-Star game. They say that’s preposterous. You know what’s more preposterous? The guy with the first most home runs of any career player not to make the All-Star game.
Bottom 3rd
1 0
9:03 — American League pitchers are also great at futilely legging out Brian Giles’ inning-ending groundouts. They just don’t get the chance.
9:01 — A bigger turn-on than pitchers hitting? Pitchers trying to steal. Baek wasn’t being held, and the jump was restaurant quality.
8:58 — Joe Morgan is pretty sure all AL pitchers are good hitters. A backhanded compliment at the American League, telling them to get rid of the DH. (Hey, the Reds didn’t need it.)
8:58 — Baek fends off a pitch the other way between Howard and the first baseman for a hit. Commotion! Helping his own cause!
8:56 — Ah, what a time for the hotel wi-fi to force me to renew my 24-hour voucher and restart my laptop. Maybe it’s a sign.
8:55 — Maurice Jones-Drew loves his Madden games. If I were paid to do a commercial for it, I would too.
Top 3rd
8:52 — Ryan Howard strikes out to finish off that inning. How many times have we said that?
8:50 — Right field is what Joe Morgan says Tony Perez called “big man territory.” Anecdotal enough? Sure. Mark it.
8:47 — Brian Giles can’t get to that foul ball short of the foul pole, and as a result barrels into the padded door. Proving he wasn’t raised in a barn, Giles kindly tries to close the door.
8:43 — So, they’re still on the “This Is Our Country” TV spots, aren’t they? When do they get Christina Aguilera to lip-synch to it?
Bottom 2nd
1 0
8:42 — Inning over. They got bored with it, probably.
8:40 — There’s a 90-year-old man in Baltimore who watches SNB every week, but Jon Miller points out that because he’s getting older, he doesn’t always stay up for the entire game. Morgan replied with something about the East Coast/West Coast. I really hope he wasn’t implying that because this game is played on the West Coast, he can stay up for it.
8:39 — The one thing I will trust Analyst Joe Morgan on is how to turn a double play. Not in 2008, though.
8:38 — Chase Headley and Chase Utley. Which one’s the evil twin? Headley flies out to left.
8:35 — OK, commercials for “back to school” cell phones just irritates the problem further. I am a big-time advocate for corporal punishment on those who can’t silence their cell phones during classes.
1 0
8:33 — See, this is why you listen to the scouting reports. Quickly Baek finishes his 2nd inning of work.
8:31 — With one quick out, Let’s take a look at the scouting report on the Padres’ hurler:
Name: Cha Seung Baek
Born: May 29, 1980, Pusan, South Korea
Throws: Right
Bats: Right
Scratches: Left
Years in MLB: 3
Memorable years in MLB: 0
Pitches: Fastball, curveball, change-up, slider
Snitches: When he was 10, told his teacher that the kid behind him was an international arms dealer
How To Approach Baek: He doesn’t have a strong out pitch and doesn’t always go deep in a game, so be patient
How To Approach Baek If You’re Jon Miller: As an over-enunciating Hispanic announcer trying to over-enunciate a Korean name
Bottom 1st
1 0
8:28 — Wait … what happened? That was it? Did Hamels throw three baseballs, all of them strikes? Because I thought you could only do that in Baseball Simulator 1.000.
8:27 — Working quick, Hamels already has two out.
Top 1st
1 0
8:23 — Shane Victorino, he grounds out. Just the one run for now, thankyouverymuch.
8:21 — After walking Ryan Howard, Baek gives Pat Burrell the gift of first base, which might be the gift that keeps on giving this inning. Another tree visits the mound to speak with Baek.
8:19 — A ray of sunlight peeks through the clouds onto Baek and his uniform. He’s been spotted.
I’d have loved to have seen the Phillies come out wearing bright orange vests.
8:16 — Joe Morgan appears visibly distracted. Probably didn’t finish his Bejeweled game in time.
8:13 — Jayson Werth sacks the fly and Rollins tags up. Nine runs to Saget.
8:12 — Jimmy Rollins is already at third base. Slow down, tiger.
8:09 — Interesting move by the Padres. They’re wearing these:
Apparently they have decided to try and blend in with the field, in hopes the Phillies think they’re actually playing in a slightly decimated forest, will give up, and San Diego will win by forfeit.
8:05 — Something about this Yellow Pages commercial bugs me. So the girl wants to remove the tramp stamp with her ex-boyfriend’s name. How did she get a new fiancé with that tattoo there the entire time? Maybe she just kept it missionary style while living in sin. Or maybe in the future men aren’t allowed to object to their girlfriends’ ink.
8:00 — Wow. “Tony Gwynn” in the first sentence of the telecast. Jon Miller has seen the bingo card and is coming out swingin’ tonight.
Pregame Babble
It’s probably too late to take the cameras and crew down to Texas for the Rays-Rangers game, isn’t it?
Because exactly one group of people cares about this one: Phillies fans. The Padres faithful are probably too busy trying to rig their fantasy draft order so they can nab LaDainian Tomlinson. Then there’s me. I haven’t done a Jon Miller-Joe Morgan Joint yet, and there’s not much time left in the year.
Now, this one has the potential to get ugly. Cole Hamels has pitched well — the run support just hasn’t been there for him. The Padres’ starter, Cha Seung Baek, has an ERA on the wrong side of five. If Howard-Utley-Burrell-whoever-else-they-have wake up (much like my college roommate did, hungover and next to Cha Seung Baek), this one might turn into a 12-2 rout or something like that. So at least there’s something to look forward to. If this game gets into a double-digit laugher, I might start live blogging the Bob Saget roast.
And if it goes 15, I have the noose tied up and ready to go. Now for the bingo-age:
By the way, DUAN is the official sanctuary of off-topic discussions. If you want to talk there, go right ahead. Or chat here. It basically comes down to who you respect more: Zerkle or myself.
Continue Reading August 15th, 2008
Notable Olympic happenings from Friday …
The Cuban Dream Team rolled the U.S. in baseball, 5-4 in 11 innings on Friday, sending our friendly island neighbors well toward their way to a fourth gold medal in five years. We’re now 0-2 1-2, but still alive, wishing that Bud Selig would have scheduled a two-week August break in the majors so that all of our Cubans could play theirs. Then we’d show ‘em.
Of course, the way Cuba won was kind of lame. The newly adopted extra-inning rule calls for, starting in the 11th, runners to start on first and second and teams can start at any point in their batting order. Yes, like in softball. The rule got used for the first time Friday, twice. In the other early game, China earned its first ever Olympic victory with an 8-7 win over Taiwan in 12 innings. In a metaphor of what was soon to come, Jayson Nix fouled a ball off his left eye to start the bottom of the 11th for the U.S.
• Hot Chile Comin’ Through. So the men’s tennis final is the matchup you’ve all been waiting for; Fernando Gonzales of Chile vs. Rafael Nadal or Novak Djokovic. James Blake, who upset Roger Federer on Thursday, came up short in the semis, 4-6, 7-5, 11-9. Then in the true spirit of the Games, he accused Gonzales of cheating. Blake said that Gonzales failed to admit the truth about a disputed point two games before the finish. “I’ve spoken all week about how much I’ve enjoyed the Olympic experience, how much I love the spirit of it,” Blake said. “That’s a disappointing way to exit the tournament, when you not only lose the match, but you lose a little faith in your fellow competitor.” Actually Blake will play for the bronze medal on Saturday. Somebody should tell him.
• The Write Stuff. Quiet if you please, I’m trying to read Natasha Kai’s tattoo. The Flyin’ Hawaiian, as she’s called, headed in an extra-time goal, giving the defending Olympic champion United States a 2-1 win over Canada in women’s soccer. The win put the U.S. in the semifinals. Brazil beat Norway 2-1 earlier Friday. Also, Japan beat China 2-0.
• Zorro Curiously Absent. France won the team gold medal in men’s epee fencing, beating Poland in the title bout. The French trio of Athos, Porthos, and Aramis Jerome Jeannet, Fabrice Jeannet and Ulrich Robeiri won 45-29 in the gold medal bout. Poland took the silver, and Italy won the bronze.
Continue Reading August 13th, 2008
We have a new President. I suppose they’ll go on with these convention thingees anyway, because the deposit on the arenas are non-refundable. But we know who’s going to win. Minor league teams in six cities handed out bobbleheads of the two Presidential candidates during special promotions last week, with each fan choosing either a Barack Obama or John McCain model, each of which represented a Presidential vote. (In 2004, the same promotion predicted a narrow GW Bush victory). And when the dust had cleared on Monday, one candidate emerged with a clean sweep of all venues. So please nod your head comically and whistle Hail to the Chief for …
Barak Barack Obama.
If presumptive presidential nominee Barack Obama wins the election in November, he will look back at the Goldklang Group’s “Bobblection 2008” as his springboard to the White House. Obama finished a clean sweep taking the Fort Myers vote on Monday night, to complete a six-city blanking of John McCain. Obama garnered 54.4% of the vote (500 bobbleheads), while McCain notched 45.6% of the vote (419 bobbleheads). The six cities represent the homes of Goldklang Group teams.
The junior United States Senator from Illinois started strong at Hammond Stadium and never looked back. The first 10 voters marked their ballot for Obama. McCain tried to rally late, but came up short for the sixth straight day. Four years ago, George Bush defeated John Kerry 53% to 47% in Fort Myers. The tally was nearly identical to the final national percentages.
Upon entering Hammond Stadium, fans were directed to actual Lee County Election voting machines to cast their vote. After voting electronically, the fan then picked up their bobblehead of choice. Obama was declared the winner when all 500 of his bobbleheads were gone.
The breakdown:
• Hudson Valley, NY (Renegades): 750 (51.3%) 713 (48.7%)
• Brockton, MA (Rox): 500 (52.3%) 456 (47.7%)
• Charleston, SC (RiverDogs): 500 (58.1%) 360 (41.9%)
• St. Paul, MN (Saints): 1250 (58%) 906 (42%)
• Sioux Falls, SD (Canaries): 500 (55.2%) 405 (44.8%)
• Fort Myers, FL (Miracles): 500 (54.4%) 419 (45.6%)
• TOTALS: 4,000 ( 55.1%) 3,259 ( 44.9%)
As was inevitable, a Ron Paul bobblehead was found among the Sioux Falls results, and was asked to leave.
Elsewhere in minor league promotions:
• Salute To Jayson Stark. Thursday, Aug. 14, Lakewood BlueClaws (Class A South Atlantic League). The ESPN baseball writer will be on hand sign autographs, pose for pictures and assess your beer league softball team’s roster for key weaknesses. Will not sign body parts.
• Ty Cobb Night Friday, Aug. 15, Omaha Royals (Class AAA Pacific Coast League). As you no doubt are aware, this gala event will honor Royals communications intern Ty Cobb. Yes, that’s his real name. Ty Cobb-mania is sweeping the Midwest as you can imagine, with Mr. Cobb on hand for this game to sign autographs, pose for pictures and nail you with exposed cleats when you’re not prepared. [Thanks to Benjamin Hill]
• Civil War Night Friday, Aug. 15, Portland Beavers (Class AAA Pacific Coast League). Supporters of bitter rivals Oregon and Oregon State will take part in several in-game competitions, including the mascot beat-down.
• Asian Night. Wednesday, Aug. 20, West Virginia Power (Class a South Atlantic League). I have no idea what this is, but it’s West Virginia, so you know it’s going to be offensive.
• Weird New Jersey Night. Aug. 24, Newark Bears (Independent Atlantic League). Redundancy evidently does not concern the fine people of this state.
• Mascot of the Week. Henry the Puffy Taco, San Antonio Missions (Class AA Texas League). I am ready to declare Henry the Puffy Taco as Mascot of the Season. Congratulations, Henry. In addition to being delicious, Henry thrills spectators with various dance moves, plus his signature routine; when he “runs” the bases and lets a small child catch up and tackle him on the third-base line. Sportswriters have called it the stupidest three minutes in sports. And don’t forget Henry’s sidekick, Ballapeno, a green chili pepper. Well done, sirs.
Contact Minor Enterprise at RickChand@GMail.com.
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